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OMG "allabout" Maree20 NAILS NARCISSISTIC DISORDER-you can't crack his shell because it predates you, probably by decades. Here's the "- Notes" version Housewives want casual sex Laurel Maryland 20707 of the emotional affair that ND has caused in my life- I too feel that you are a very nurturing person. This tragiy puts you in the cross-hairs of N's emotional cannon. While my about-to-be-ex's admittedly toxic giving is driven by "need to pls daddy"(another blog/time); her need is a white-hot target for "Just Friend"'s narcissism. His emotional warp began in a 3BR 5 household, an emotionally detached Mother, and 2 learning-disabled sisters who needed all Mom's limited nurturing. Not surprising he twisted his emotional landscape to ensure an unhealthy dose of "Momma-ism" from his first wife (30+ yrs.)-a woman who overgave to defend herself from being abandoned as she was when her father left when she was. N could guarantee "Momma" would be there if he twisted his emotional masculinity in the face of her need; true self focus. This couple was our "bestfriend" for 25+ yrs (., owned lake house, he/I worked together, same social circle). His ex became more desperate/upset in the face of my about-to-be ex's over-giving nature. He, as a typical N, took great affront at his ex's distress nobly touting his "trauma" over "nothing more than friends" while, at the same time, stoking my about-to-be-ex's issues with "male authority figures". His contrived nobility was contagious in the social circle-N again. Attempts to communicate with him are fruitlees. His hyper-sensitivity and defensiveness reveal his/about-to-be-ex's guilty consciences even further yet, in some bizarre way only the Narcissist can understand, reinforce and trumpet his/her nobility. As our marriage has collapsed (I'm not blameless), N holds himself haughtily above the fray-he and my about-to-be-ex "nobly enduring" his ex's desperate maneuvers to hold on, and their divorce; unwittingly abetted by a social circle drawn in to his/my about-to-be's charm-the simplest hints of any improprieties on his part are met with stunningly immature tantrums, tirades, obscenities and pouts-at 57 years old. "allabout"-you can't fight or right this-get the help you need-and try to move on-if you're lucky, you'll find, like I have, there are angels around you-