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Spatula City, Here We Come! I'm really not sure where I was going with that whole "Spatula City" bit, so...
My name's Frank.
I do not sell spatulas or spatula accessories. I understand if that's a deal breaker for you. I probably should have been more honest in my title. I just get excited sometimes. Exuberant, even. It's a thing.
I read a bunch of the other guys' ads before posting mine, and I was shocked at how they all seem to be written by the same horny 7th grader... all pursuing the same drunk girl at the same school dance. Icky. So, I'll try to throw something a little more original out, and see how that works.
I'm a 36 year old single dad. My daughter spends her time between me and her mom, which is how it's been for quite a while now... no problems there. (YAY! He can keep a commitment!)
I just relocated to Norman from Tulsa a few months ago to be closer to my daughter, and I don't know a lot of people here yet. I'm starting to get to know the area, but it's far from what I'd "home". It's nice though, as cities go. I grew up in the Pacific Northwest, so I'm used to a lot more mountains, trees, and you know, water that isn't sewage.
A few things about me:
I've been a licensed, professional tattooist for ten years. This does not mean I'm interested in talking about your tattoo ideas. I'm not.
I am also a machinist/welder. Honestly, metal work interests me far more than tattooing right now... it's fun.
I have a soft spot for good cooking, but I'm not at all fat. I like to cook as much as I like being cooked for.
I'm a very stay-at-home kinda guy for the most part. I work, I take care of my kid, once in a while i go have a beer (generally just by myself, I'm not a "out with the boys" kind of fella), and other than that, I just pretty much stay home.
I go to the gym a lot, I'd say 3 or 4 times a week. I also do goofy stuff like spontaneously go on 25 mile bicycle rides, which I did on Sunday... that was fun, but draining. I was so starved for calories by the end of it that I ended up stopping at a buffet on my way back and making them sincerely regret the day they ever uttered the phrase "all you can eat".
I love Adult Swim cartoons, punk rock,. DIY projects, I'm starting to get really super into bicycles for some reason... reading... I collect antique books, and I'd like to get into geocaching. If you know what urbex is and have any interest in it, please move to the front of the line.
I'm looking for intelligent, pretty, active women with a good sense of humor. I don't mind if you have kids but I'm not interested in raising them for you, I'm busy with my own and basiy just looking for companionship, not more responsibility in my life. Please be between 21 and 38, and I guess we've come to the part where I say "no drama", but a common thread in personals ads housewives looking nsa Wethersfield is that those who say "no drama" are generally the biggest drama queens you'll ever meet. So, I invite you to bring your drama!
Feel free to text me.
I don't really want emails, just texts.
4 zero five. 5 3 two. twenty-four 99.
DON'T SEND ME PICTURES. I SAID, DON'T SEND ME PICTURES. WHEN I WANT A PICTURE I'LL ASK YOU FOR ONE. FIRST, SHOW ME YOU HAVE SOMETHING GOING ON IN THE BRAINS DEPARTMENT.
If you're too scared to text because some dangerous internet predator/ice cream truck guy/angry drunken midget might end up with your number... I dunno what to tell ya. Honestly though I think it could be pretty cool, having a drunk midget follow you around all the time. Especially if he was driving an ice cream truck. Imagine him, sloppy drunk, weaving around in that ice cream wagon, with that music blaring all the time. Little guy. You can't drive.
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